Prayer, Part I

I have always wondered about prayer - to me, it is one of the greatest mysteries of a life of faith. It seems to have the potential for such greatness (and, for some, reaches that level) but, for most of us, remains difficult, disappointing, and rather confusing. I have learned a lot about this over the last year, both in my experience and in study, and decided to lead some discussions on the topic for a group at my church over the next couple of months.

So tonight, as I work on the final preparations for the first talk tomorrow, here's what I find going through my mind:

• Why did I ever think this was a good idea?
• More to the point, why did I think I should be the one doing it?
• How in the world am I supposed to fit everything that should be said into four 1-hour sessions?!?
• How am I supposed to figure out everything that should be said in the first place?
  

It seems so... big. And difficult. And, honestly, a long ways beyond me. Most of the time, I tend to talk about things that have been a puzzle for me, topics that have been troubling me and that I have wanted to dive in and gain some certainty (or at least a better perspective) on, and then I am able to share both the process and the discoveries I have made with the people around me. But this seems different.

Even after a lot of study, I still feel like I have more questions than answers. And if I don't know the truth, it will be hard for me to present much of value. What I know I don't want is to be the blind man pretending that he is capable of actually being a guide... and ending up dragging someone into a hole with me as I fall. So, somewhat ironically, I will be praying that I am able to talk about prayer in a way that honors God and is in keeping with the truth.

I'll report back on Wednesday...